Grammy's: A Running Internets Commentary (Editing to be done later.)

Pre-Show:
Ryan Seacrest. Please stop making short jokes and spiking your hair. I get it. You are self-deprecating. Self-deprecating does not always equal funny. Just ask Ben Mulroney.

7:02: I didn't remember "Roxanne" being so long and without any perceptible lyrics... maybe I'm just remembering the P. Diddy version.

7:10 Why did that one Dixie Chick steal my cousin's prom dress from 1991? It didn't look good then.. and it certainly doesn't look good now.

7:18 Oh Prince.... back in your Purple Rain days, you could have been an exception to my "No Short Guys" Rule. I would have let you purify me in the waters of Lake Minnetonka.

7:19 Beyonce, shut it.

7:20: Is one of the Black Eyed Peas wearing an Ear Cast? Is it possible to break your ear?

7:25 Mary J. Blige has never won a Grammy? What the shit?

7:33 JT, you are hot. Your neck hair is not.

7:37 God, I hate the back humping jam.

7:38 Wha? Blair witch project.. where did you come from? Wha?

7:40 Mary J. Two for two.

7:48 Corrine Bailey Ray.. you do have a lovely voice. One I could definitely fall asleep to.
7:51 John Legend. I love you and your velveteen jackets. You know how to emote. (and to look classy in velveteen. Something I have not mastered yet.)
7:54 Oh John Mayer... you had me at "Your body is a wonderland"

7:58: Grammy for John Mayer. See above.

8:05 Shakira and Wyclef Jean. Hips don't lie. Makes me want to take Belly Dancing Lessons. again.

8:06 Phone rang.

8:20 I have no idea what just happened.... or why the guy from Gnarls Barkley is wearing a pilot's outfit. But I do respect his love of the costume.

8:25.. Luda... read this article... http://entertainment.sympatico.msn.ca/Oscars/OscarStory.aspx?cp-documentid=2834230

8:35 I love that Mary J. just referred to herself in the third person. E likes.

8:41. I forgive you Dixie Chick for wearing a bad dress. You just made a Simpsons reference. That makes everything ok.

8:48... "You made one of the two classic blunders... the first is never go in in a land war against Asia"... Classic line. I want to attend a sci-fi geek wedding where the groom answers, "as you wish" to everything. That would be awesome. What? Did YTV get pjs back? I miss PJ Jenn. (Sorry I got bored and started switching channels)

8:57 Carrie Underwood.. you bore me.

9:01 And apparently now you won a Grammy. This may or may not signal me turning off the TV and watching the rest highlighted on the internet.. or tomorrow on Extra.

9:09.. Ok I am glad I stuck around. It doesn't get any better than Smokey Robinson wearing a Lace Shirt and singing "Tracks of my Tears", one of my favourite songs of all-time.
9:11 Is Lionel going to sing "Hello"? Yes, yes he is. I never realized how slightly creepy and stalkerish this song is, he has never introduced himself to this girl, but... "I hear you pass in the hall", and "Let me start by saying, I love you." Uh... I love you too, now excuse me while I call 911. No offense.
9:15... Chris Brown.. are you even singing?

9:20... And due to hunger and boredness... I am going to end this transmission.
For more informative stuff see:
http://www.grammy.com/

or

http://theenvelope.latimes.com/awards/grammys/

E gots to go.